Fucking hell

I’m terribly sorry if this title offends you, but, in my defence, it is not what you think it is. This week’s story, which is related to a subject discussed here in all seriousness before, starts in a village in Austria situated 33 kilometres north of Salzburg. Just like a considerable number of other places in Bavaria and Austria, its name ends in –ing. Can you guess what the first part is?

‘Fuck’, yes! (Again, no expletive.) Indeed, the place is called Fucking. In case you were wondering, it is pronounced with a closed ‘u’ /ʊ/, as in ‘put’. Obviously, due to its similarity with a tremendously rude English word, the place has gained some fame in English-speaking countries. The poor inhabitants of Fucking, of course, can’t help it.

But if they had a really wicked sense of self-deprecating humour, they would have done what a German company did in 2010: they went to court and won the right to name a beer ‘Fucking hell’. ‘Hell’ is the equivalent of ‘pale’ – ‘ein Helles’ is the common expression for a light lager as opposed to a dark beer. So in German it makes perfect sense to call a beer from Fucking ‘Fucking hell’. The court obviously agreed. Never mind that Fucking has no brewery (yet)…So there you go.

During my research for this blog entry, I came across an Austrian film called ‘Bad Fucking’. ‘Bad’ in German means ‘bath’ or ‘bathroom’ and in names of towns and villages is a relic referring to the fact that there are some types of, usually thermal, springs in the area (as in ‘Bad Saarow’ – highly recommended for a weekend away). So these places are historic spa places. There is no real place called ‘Bad Fucking’ – but there might as well be.

So next time you’ve had a bad day in the Salzburg area, why not think To hell with it…and have a Fucking hell for substantiation? Sounds effing splendid!

Next week, we’ll deal with a much more cultured form of pastime. (Did I hear someone say ‘Boooring!’?)

The Pommes Buddha says: Let’s call a Fucking a Fucking.

Listen to this text as a podcast episode:

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